Watch: IT Family Returned to India After 20 Years in the US

3:17 Not a short duration it's like almost you know a good format like you know it's a good life right for anyone to live abroad so I know you kind of mentioned about like you know some of the key trigger points like anything your parents health and you know before the kids are at certain age but have you had this in the back of the mind that you always want to return back to India or is it something that kind of evolved later in the life like as you you know keep you know staying there in us and then once that is one question and then there is a certain point where you made a decision right like you know let's say you know in a year or 6 months beforehand or something how did you plan about the move like like you know from a financial Logistics careerwise so if you can peel it a little bit that would be helpful because for somebody who is living there for 20 years it's a big decision and you know has that been all along the process and then you know what was your planning throughout the process so I I'll I'll I'll put it this

4:18 Way so moving back was something we considered was always under consideration but the exact point was like you know you want to move back when when the move makes an impact right you should move back at a at a point where where you think that you can get the maximum impact out of that move right so for us that in my case it turned out to be to be at that time and in terms of like planning and the logistics I should it's actually honestly all of all of that was all Mina I mean this is like 100% mea so she did so she actually but he did tell me a year ago like we decided we moved back in so when we moved back a year ago we decided that when my D daughter transitions to the next school grade like when she was going from first grade to second grade we thought we would try one school I think school finishes in the US by May and June 1 week and school

5:19 Starts here by June 2nd week or something right roughly that's how the school system works so we decided we will use that window to move back and see how it will work out so a year back we sort of roughly arrived Year back one year back decided okay next year we should put this into action and so we had that onee time frame where we could slowly work through like you said the logistics of moving back or finances what do we do about our jobs and things like that but since we had like he said since it was always something under consideration I think U it helped because we this was a thought at the back of our mind so that was something that was there for several years before but it was not like something where we you know our investments and everything over the last one year we sort of adjusted it so that when we came back here we could operate everything online from gear itself and do things like that that's sort of

6:19 How we managed the move so it also helped that U my my mother-in-law actually looked at the school which is right across our house and said that see they have their admissions opening and they willing to send this entrance test papers to school in the US and if they can actually make her fill it out and scan it back to us you don't even have to travel for the entrance test so that also made it easier because some schools would expect in India that you travel back and you make the child go through all of that right so this was also a newer school so the toilets and you know those things matter to a child that age right because it all looked nice and clean my mother-in-law checked it out for us and said see it's nice it's clean I think she will be able to adjust so it helped that the school sent some entrance papers and my daugh it is a very basic test in some basic English and math questions and she wrote it and she cleared it and of course we had to pay some management fees up front of the schools and we also consciously decided let's not put her in an international school here which I think

7:20 If you have older kids you may have to do that because they yeah so that's where that's that's really where the the the diff the you know the complications of of like you know moving later come into play because like usually when you know when if you move when you're like in middle school then things like you know how the kids you're always concerned about whether the kids are are are are like you know getting a a smooth education you want to make sure that their education is like you know as transition there's no there's no friction everything is like Smooth you want to make it I mean as parents we all want to give the best education to our right so that's the so the timing of the move was largely based on when the school year ends there and the school year starts here we had that flexibility but we knew that given his parents health situation if he tried to postpone that even that flexibility won't be there and we may have to do some kind of an emergency adjustment which will not work well for

8:21 Everybody so we felt that when we had the window which where we could you know utilize it properly let's utilize it and if it doesn't work out will think about Alternatives two years later or something because he had a citizenship at that point of time and I had my permanent residency so we thought okay we will give this and we'll be open-minded about this and we'll give it a shot for two to three years we'll make sure that his situation improves and should things really not work out after two to three years then we can always consider relocating back to the US but that didn't happen so that's why you're having us so one one thing was that you know if you ask me now so my dad passed away about two months ago he was so he was 86 so I got to spend 10 years with him and I got to spend you know so the the good thing is that when I look back right now I feel that I feel really good about the fact that I was there when when when they

9:22 Needed me and you know I feel good about the fact that you know I got to spend a lot of time time with my dad so that is something that you know looking back I feel that oh thank God I did this because now you know I can see that I have a lot of good memories about you know the the time we spent and like you know that the the the fact that I I think had I not done it I would have had I I I I would have felt bad about it oh yeah thanks for sharing that

9:56 Again sorry for the loss of your father but again I think you know the key thing is you know spending quality time you know with the parents and that's the main objective and seems like you know able to do that is you know so invensible right I mean you know nothing to regret right and I know you kind of touchit yeah you kind of touch bit on the schooling side maybe before we dive into that a little bit I just want to check if you are okay in terms of the career transition right so I know you had about an year to plan you kind of touched a little bit on the logistics you both mentioned that you both are in it working there for a long time so have you looked at like an internal transfer or have you like know left the jobs and tried to find some jobs here so if you can talk a little bit about your career planning in terms of the move that would be very helpful too yeah mine was an internal transfer so and that was also a lucky thing right I was thinking I'll have to come back to India and look for a job but it just so happened that six months before we moved

10:58 My my startup got acquired by a larger company in the US and that larger company had operations in Chennai so so the management said why don't you go back there and work and we'll work something out right so that turned out to be a nice surprise it was not planned but it turned out that way so I'm happy for that in his case since his family situation was a little difficult he decided to take a different path and I let him talk about it so so I've been so basically I'm like so I'm I'm 53 now so it's you know I've spent a lot of time in the industry so like the first 10 years I was I you know I spent doing vanilla flavor software development then I made this transition to to data science so it turned out that so that was about the time that I had Al so I was a contractor so basically I lived in the Washington DC area so I was a federal government contractor so you I did so when I when I decided to move back I had you

12:00 Know this was also one of the I thought it was like a good time for me I mean it turned out to be that from a career from a career standpoint I also wanted to do a PhD had been that was also something that was always in the back of my mind and I thought okay now is the time to to get that in as well so as soon as I got back I I got that so I I took five years to do that so I got that off my bucket list the the the very happy again when I look back that is something that gave me a lot of satisfaction and gave me a lot of I mean again I'm glad I did that so after that I kind of like again moved back into by then I think because of covid you know remote work became normalized so I transition to to to a remote work Arrangement so that's kind of my story got it so seems like I think

12:58 H is little bit unusual you followed the of the passion and went with your bucket list did the PHD which is kudos to you you know to take it off and complete it and doing it at you know at that stage in the life and so congratulations on that so I think that's helpful so with that said are there any tips or anything I know you have been living here for 10 years you know you have seen the work life balance the lifestyle of the you know the working culture in India versus you know the working culture in us anything that you can talk about the culture is one aspect the second one is also if somebody is like planning to move and you have might have seen the shift or change in India in terms of the employment in terms of the opportunities anything that you can talk you know what are the current opportunities people who are thinking to move back how they should approach what they should you know from you as an experienced veteran you know it you know

13:59 You know folks if you can share any any insights that would be very helpful okay I go yeah so in terms of the insights I think you should be very clear about why you want to move okay you have to be very very clear about it if you're if you and you have to have a open mind see you're moving from a a developed Nation to a developing country so things are very volatile here right yes it is your own culture you were raised in this culture but you were away from it for so long so there is going to be some reverse culture shock that will caught you off guard especially for the first one or two years right you can't help but keep comparing notes with how your life back in the US was and if you sort of look at everything in India as some downgraded version of what you got in the US then you won't be able to make a successful transition you have to keep in mind the reality in India is it's a developing country it's a very rich and vibrant Country and and there's a lot I mean food and culture is a big

15:01 Plus if you ask me and being close to your family at least those were big pluses for us right so in terms of our jobs we were open like since we had stayed for that long there and we had we realized that when we came back here the opportunities can be mixed it it turned out to be a nicer surprise because both of us got good opportunities after we moved back here but that's not something which we because when we were in the US we were like oh we're not sure what we're going to get how it's going to be maybe all the jobs are in Bangalore whereas we are in Chennai so how is that going to work out we had all those kind of concerns but I think some of that was easily put to rest but you should be very clear about your move and you should have an open-minded thing and if you think about all the pluses why you came back and you constantly keep reiterating that in your mind it will help you have a positive mindset towards getting adjusted to life here same with your children I think you should let them have an open mind right before they come back here itself we shouldn't be conditioning them

16:02 About India being dirty or things like that which sometimes if you start doing that when they come back here they may take a little bit of time to transition but if you have an open mind you'll automatically be able to pass on that open mind to your children and I think the whole adjustment becomes a lot better through that yeah any specific

16:21 Insights in terms of the career opportunities currently in India for somebody like you know thinking about a transition so more on the career growth I mean like you know kind of opportunities here in India right now yeah yeah so I'm still working for a US organization sub captive here in India like they call it right so it's been like I'm in systems development and application development I'm an architect right now so here and it's I think Bangalore has Bangalore and the Delhi NCR region when I go and look at jobs there it seems to be abundant when I look at these the opportunities there I think in Chennai and Pune and all it tends to be you've I think there are still opportunities but you've got to look and see whether you land what you really like but I think if you're an It generally India has a good vibrant job market and I think the Indian startup scene over the last 10 years has exploded I mean you keep

17:21 Hearing about so many people which was all unheard of maybe in the early 2000s I think you hear all these promising sto stories where people want to try out their own thing and you know there's much more entrepr entrepreneurship that's there right now which I think is a really good thing so if you have a lot of energy and you want to try out something I think even the Venture Capital funding and all that is probably more accessible right now so it's I would say it's pretty positive at this point in terms of somebody who wants to come back and they have a lot of energy I think there's a lot of opportunities so the the one thing I would say is that I mean so here's how I would summarize this no matter what whether you live in the US whether you live in India whether you live no matter where you live life is not perfect there are going to be I mean you know you know in ter terms of in terms of your career in terms of your in terms of like home life whatever it's not life is not perfect so you know the the the real question is where is

18:22 When you're contrasting when you're contrasting two situations it's it's it's important to understand that whether it's whether it's situation A or situation B both are bad it's not like it's not like one is like uniquely better you I mean both have pluses and minuses and since you made that hopefully you made that hope when you make the change and when you made a choice hopefully you made a choice fully conscious of the fact that this is not perfect too neither was the previous one so the but remember yourself and learn to it's more important or at least the way that I felt the way I approached it was to to to if you if you feel getting bogged down by by things that that adversely affect you to remind yourself of the of of why you why you made this transition and why you you know the the the to to to recall the the positives that brought you here and always though I mean in each one for each person the positives are different

19:23 It could be food it could be time with your parents it could be you know it could be doing the activi that you enjoy here so that would that would kind of like set things again in perspective so you know and you know you know that yeah this is why I did this and and it makes you enjoy those things better and usually when you when you go when you when you reset your perspective that way things usually the the The Nostalgia actually goes away the the the you realize that you did this for for a reason and and Things fall into place well thanks for sharing that so I mean I think just a quick summary of what I heard is I think you know in terms of the career opportunities especially for somebody from it that are quite abundant you know it can vary from a city to city but it's very very abundant and also the startup ecosystem is very much thriving in the last 10 years in terms of the VC funding the entrepreneurship and so on and the key

20:25 Thing is no place is perfect I mean it just depends on what your key priorities are and then you know just choose with it and you have to manage the other minor things that comes along the way there is no other you know any any any so I know you kind of touched a little bit about your daughter I think you know who joined the school at the second grade and so on just wondering in terms of how well she adapted you know her Social Circle the friends you know you know I think it's a different vibrant L when she came back here right so she realized you don't have to strap up yourself in the car she can sit there right and the lunch scene and all was very vibrant here like her school had a cafeteria of course she used to take lunch from home but if she didn't like it she could go to the CAF we vegetarian so the cafeteria lunch was a big thing for her and I think she immediately identified that people look like her and there is I mean she was not sure what it

21:25 Is but she knew that culturally there was lot of similarities right accent wise and all by end of second grade she was her she was completely you know acclimatized to this she' made a huge gang of friends and U it was a big win for her from where the way for her it was a big so she's like very happy and yeah so when she looks back she says see you you know my second grade I think I it took me a little bit of time but I really didn't because even in the US I think she was in a montor for the first three years and then she had to transition into the public school system for her first grade so that first grade she was not too happy there right so when she came here to second grade it's all relative right her perspective was her second grade was so much better than her first grade so from there on I think it was a big plus for her and I think she was able to adapt really well here so one thing I would say Ain this is not related to the children but it's so you know but one thing I say

22:26 Especially to people my age who you know who are considering the moveback it's people's perspectives the the the perspectives have changed considerably in the workforce it is not the same people's approach to work and how they the profession the perspectives are completely different it's like it's it's a it's a new generation it's like it's and it's it's and it's really nice and I would I I would say it's like you know it is all very good so I would say that that's you know definitely something to I mean it's it's important to not think about their perspective of the workforce like 20 years ago and then think that you know the workforce is the same again it's very very different it's very different and the other thing is right the East Coast company I don't know what the West Coast company culture in the US was like but I still work for a financial company here whose headquarters is on the east coast and I would say that the average age of the it

23:28 Employee in the US in India is much younger than the average age of the IT person in the US at least along the east coast right so I find that so they have a much more vibrant en energetic attitude towards life here and that's another thing which I think is a big positive sometimes it used to you know the kind like I remember they had some cultural event at work and they had this whole some kind of a thing which which was a song and dance thing which you don't really do in the US when you have Christmas parties and all they tend to be more sober or I don't know soers right it things can be a little bit more vibrant here because it's a younger crowd and it's a different culture so those may seem a little new to you or you know it'll take getting used to but I still think if you have an open mind you would be able to mix well yeah definitely yeah thanks for sharing sounds like I think she's having a blast and then she enjoyed the

24:29 So now switching a little bit yeah go ahead yeah so switching Gars

24:39 A little bit so how has been your social life and you know the quality of life since the move so just wondering on that in terms of how how has it been going for you like social life day-to-day life and so on so personality wise I mean there's a it's so I would say you know there's a so again again that depends from on person to person because I'm I'm not I'm I'm more of an I mean I'm slightly introverted so I guess both of us are slightly introverted but with that said we have like a lot more you know there's a chance for me to connect with old friends here there's a chance chance for me to actually yeah I would say it is definitely been it's been a it's been an improvement for sure it's it's definitely been an improvement for sure yes yeah for me I would say it's more or

25:40 Less stayed the same right I mean because I think if I look at most friends my age they're all in the US many of them big bulk of them right and even after I moved back a few of my friends who were working in Bangalore moved to move to the US but I think this will become more relevant than when you actually retire because at that point of time this becomes important like they say it said that you know reti financial planning is one part of retirement the other part is the social what you do with your time and the the opportunities you have for for engagement and being engaged and you know having a a full life Beyond in your retirement right so that is something that what you just bought up becomes very relevant when you when you when you when you want to retire and I think it becomes I do believe that it will be the case we will We I think personally I think we'll have a we are better we are better position for that got one

26:43 Thing which I do miss about the us though is when my I think you're just like almost like taking a queue before I even asked the question I was just about to ask the question are there anything that you miss in us and then you just start I was I I missed the was green spaces you could go for walks out in the woods the library system there was fantastic and you know the kind of extracurricular activities and the exposure which I was able to give my child there right like you could do I think I took up for what what is the thing which we went for let's swimming not the not the swim yeah like you had these recreational centers which were run by the county which were really good if you look at the quality of the swimming pools there and all it was outstanding I mean I've seen a few here but I think what you get there for free itself the quality is much better and if you want an equivalent quality here you're looking at paying quite a steep fee for that and in terms of books and the library system there I don't think we have such a thriving system here and again the kind of classes

27:43 Extracurricular activities I could put her what was the thing where she went Raj that ice skating ice skating and a lot of you know the small things like The Little Gym and those type of things they're picking up here maybe because now that my daughter is no longer that age I felt that what what was available for you for free there was really premium and you sort of when you only when you come back here you really miss out those Open Spaces kind of facilities which you took for granted which the county gave you out of the box I think those were things which and I Missed The Fall season there I mean it's really nice those colors are very nice and yeah I missed that and it us had a different kind of diversity right it was like a melting PO for a lot of cultures from all over the world so you still somehow some there is that aspect but then I think the internet and with access to social media you get to hear different voices wherever you sit regardless of where you sit or not but I still think that being a melting part you had to really develop an open mind to mix there and I think that was something that diversity is also something I think which I miss hear

28:44 Sometimes once in a while and I think the work life balance there which you have is phen is relatively much much better than the work life balance you have in India if you look at the work life culture I like the US culture still a little little better than what I have here and then in terms of the commute I think the travel the the roads and the commute here can be very painful and this is me and I stay like what I think I stay he works remotely from home so the commute is not a factor for him but for me I stay 6 kilometers from work and I just drive to work and come right come back home and that's like a 30 minute commute for me each way but when I see some of my co-workers and all they it's like they the average seems to be one to one and a half hours each way for them so if I look at that commute and all over time it can take its toll and on your quality of life we may we stay in a way and where my job is that commute doesn't hurt me but I see that it hurts a vast majority of my co-workers so

29:45 Those are still downsides here I mean India is still a developing country infrastructure and everything is not where it needs to be right in terms of supporting the individual ual well so I think those are still things where there's a lot of room for improvement in our country yeah no thanks for sharing that again I think it's a lot of valuable and perspective information there so are there any topics that we haven't covered that we have in touch base that you would like to you know bring up or talk through I'm not I don't know if there's anything specific you want to ask you can ask us and we glad to okay sure I think I kind of touched

30:32 On the you know kids career you know anything I think on the cost of living from a financial side anything that you want to touch I mean anything that you want oh yeah great great question great question India's infl I don't know I think in the US last few years from what my sister and our relatives tell US inflation there is also creeping up and in India inflation is a different ball game altogether right cost of Health like if you you look at inflation of healthcare cost it's almost 15% right and if you look at food and groceries you're looking at like roughly 5 to 7% here on year so inflation is something which you need to think about and factor in and so you know what you when you went back went from India here if you say you had a Dosa for you know 20 rupees when you were in 2004 or 2005 to get a good quality those are now it's probably 100 bucks or a little bit more or 120 bucks or something like that right so inflation can be a big killer here and you need to make sure that your long-term financial planning takes that inflation into consideration and you

31:34 Should yeah that's a big factor in your overall financial planning and yeah I mean in terms of owning I think it helped that you know we had a house here when we moved back so we were not we didn't have to buy a house and go through that process so our perspect we may not be able to offer much perspective there it helped us definitely that we had a nice house in a good part of the city so that really helped that transition and like I said a kids's school was just half a kilometer across so she still doesn't know what travel or traffic in India is like because her whole life in India is around the 2 kilometer 3 kilometer radius of live I would say a but that I think is like the I think if there's one thing that people should factor in I mean it may seem trivial and it may seem like you know a small thing but but I do think that that making sure that you do account for the for the for the commute to work if you're going to work that is if you're going

32:36 Into office for work that is like a a huge deal of your time because it's it's three hours a day it can be as bad as three hours a day and it's not just the time it's the it's the it's it's energy that you lose that that you you have to recover from the commute and you know you have to it's h there is a lot of that is something that you need to factor into into your plan after you you know when you move make the transition back right so may it may be as simple as a remote work Arrangement it could be as simple as just coming in you know going in when during off traffic or like when the traffic is not there and leaving so it it could be something like that but whatever it is it's kind of like planning for planning for something as small as that can help yeah for sure I mean you can't underestimate the traffic in India and it's not only the time as you mentioned right it's the stress like you know because it's the all the hustle and bustle that you have to go through while driving to the

33:38 Work or coming back from the work which is like you have to pay extra attention and cautious because people will be coming on different sites and so on so that puts a lot more effort diversity of traffic there you have you know you'll have a dog a buffalo a motorbike an auto Ria somebody from work when came from I said I don't do amusement parks anymore just going to work and coming back is like a you know amusement park ride some of those traffic rides can be as thrilling as that cool is there any advice for the future aspirants who are thinking about moving back to India I mean I would say that you know there is a window I mean you can't have don't do the analysis paralysis avoid the analysis paralysis I mean because that

34:39 If you miss the bus you miss the bus I mean it's but you know it's there are two sides to it don't do it without the analysis but also don't do too much of analyss yeah yeah I mean that's important you know action is Place much more more important than you know the planning and very well said So yeah thank you very much for your time and for sharing your story and for your insights it's really helpful I mean especially for somebody who lived there for 20 years and 10 years here and going through the different you know phases of the life and you know wish you all the best and thanks again for sharing your story with us thanks for having us thanks for having us by thank you all for joining us on this insightful journey of Dy return if you enjoyed this episode and want to explore more stories and expert advice make sure to subscribe and hit the notification Bell don't forget to leave a comment below with your thoughts and experiences

35:41 By the way check out the links in the description below for our Facebook group and social media for updates and engaging discussions as well as connecting with fellow the wrers thank you once again and until next time may your D journey be filled with joy growth and endless possibilities