Watch: Moving Back to India with a Middle Schooler After 13 Years in UK: The Realities

3:30 We were in Glasgow Scotland one of the friendliest cities in the world very cool laid-back people very friendly people they welcomed us with open arms the group was very good I think that was one of the turning points for a person like me I I literally found my wings not just career- wise but also socially I joined back work I joined a startup and then moved on in my career and then I realized that there's so much more that I can do over there I also started helping women find careers over there you know women like me who are moving as their husband's dependents well educated women are not able to find work maybe because of confidence or maybe the CV didn't suit people over there or in interview how to answer questions they were not able to answer just small help just a little bit push which I received early on after I old I started helping out people I got in touch with a group called Glasgow

4:32 Indians became a very active member I think one of the first female volunteer of that group we organized so many things it's really a well very well-known name Glasgow Indians in Scotland Community right from Consulate General to even anyone who moves there first thing they do is they reach out to our group for these questions which you are helping people like us answer right how's the education like how's the taxation like how to find the house and then organizing all the all these events ganpati Garba all these things we we even welcomed prime minister Nar Modi when they came there when he came there for cop 26 so all in all it was a wonderful time I won a lot of awards even Nationwide CAU a lot of recognition a lot of love so yeah UK has been a fantastic experience not just for but also socially that's great I mean

5:33 First of all so grateful for you to give back to the community right I think you know helping out the other women to get careers I know building that additional confidence so it's so grateful I mean you know just I think giving back and sounds like a very good social life right I mean you know especially someone who got Awards and you know doing that volunteering work and it's fantastic to hear so someone who is enjoying the life there so sounds like I think it's good career good social life everything is going good so why the idea of India the thought occurred to you and what made you to move or even give it a try yeah yeah so what happened was

6:16 Everything was going great till Co happened so after such an active life and such a you know life going at 100 miles per hour speed Co happened and then we were confined to a small flat in the city center no access to meeting anybody and here my family was going through a very tough time during lockdowns I come from a large family lots of cousins uncles aunts and then I lost a few family members as well which was very hard for me even my husband lost his uncle recently all these things and I couldn't do anything I was just locked up over there it was very difficult time for me for a family as a whole but I I started going into this depressive episodes and that led to you know when when mentally you're not in a proper place physically also a lot of things start

7:17 Coming up popping up and that's what was happening and right from the beginning you know because we are family oriented Soul we always had this slight dream of coming back but after covid it just became a very strong urge and ultimately a necessity that I have to be back I have to be in between my people my family of course people in Glasgow are my people as well but my family my parents in-laws and then I looked at my kids and I was like will there during you know covid lockdown all of us were having at one point this thought that are we ever going to meet the people we love again and I was like my kids you know are they ever going to enjoy the childhood that I enjoyed or you know have that bonding with their cousins and grandparents like how I had and all that just led to this perfect storm of I have to be back so we started preparing for it we can delve into it in future and how we prepared for it and yeah

8:19 Finally we in this experimental phase got it so just curious I mean I definitely understand I think covid definitely has been a very hard for lot of families I mean especially like you know being abroad and the closed ones you know not supported well in different phases right so have you always had the thought of coming back to India or it just this covid situation kind of made this point drive home like you know this is something that you have to do just curious on that like when you went to UK yeah so in our back of our mind we always

8:56 Knew that we have this responsibilities towards both sides of sides of our families where at some point we'll need to support them by being there not just financially U so we had that in the back of our minds and that's why we always kept bringing kids every year we used to have an yearly trip to India we kept bringing kids over here giving them a taste of Indian culture our lifestyle was very like how we have here in India so we we always had that feeling at the back of our mind that yes we have to be back at some point what point we didn't know maybe after retirement who knows or maybe when our parents really need them need us healthwise at that time but yeah that was the we just had that trigger of Co lockdowns where it just fastened up our process got it understood maybe if you can I know the covid was in 2020 right 2020 2021 so curious in terms of the timing of the move is that something that's brewing

9:58 And what made you to decide to move early this year like in terms of the timing is there something that was went into like a planning of like the move if there's anything that you can shed light I think that would be very

10:10 Helpful okay so we knew that we have to so first thing that comes to our mind is if we move do we want to know be back there be back to UK at some point we like okay we happy in India we would be happy in India we've grown up there me and my husband but we were not sure about the kids whether they will be able to adjust so we had to have like sort of a safety net for them so there we have to have a process of ilr something like PR and after that we need after 12 months we can apply for citizenship got it so we had to go through that process some of us out of four members some my younger daughter was already born there she already had some process going on we were we were all four at different stages of that so that was the first thing we focused on another thing we had to focus on was financial implications of it because we didn't know what kind of jobs we

11:10 Would get there yes people would people were assuring us after covid CH Market had shot up people were getting crazy salaries but we always knew that that's not something that lasts so what kind of salaries we would have and I have already told it to you our move was more financial although both of us were working we were not able to we we were very early on in our careers and we didn't we were not able to live the comfortable life you know you're still having this middle class life which our parents liveed if you're financially sound here a lot of problems that people talk about in India they go away you know a lot of struggles that people have in their mind that oh when we move to India this will happen that will happen I would say 90% of it goes away once you have this financial stability so I read up a lot about that because even though I knew that my husband would be able to support me but my parents have always instilled in me to be financially independent so I

12:11 Started reading about investing and saving and you know sips and all these isas investment instruments in UK and how I can have sort of an income even if I don't get a job that was a case scenario for me so all these things all these all this planning and then making the kids ready yeah we had all always told them that see at one point we will have to move but they knew that you know this is this is the life 12 years 13 years here this is how it will go on but you know we started slowly preparing them that this is what is going to happen this is what you can look forward to these are the challenges you might face see the freedom that we both are girls you know I've got two daughters the freedom that we give them give you here we might not be able to give you over there because there these are two different cultures two different ways of handling things and you know different safeties and all that so all these

13:12 Things we had to prepare the kids also so all these things got okay we were at a comfortable place starting of this year yeah and then we were like okay let's know let's plan it at a time when the school gets over in UK and they they start in India it didn't really exactly match we had to miss out both the sides but yeah that's when we planned no thanks a lot for giving some insights in terms of the thought process this is very helpful like I think in the different aspects of the life you know from a Financial immigration kids Readiness and so on thanks for giving the details there so that's great so if you can talk a little bit I'm very curious about this pragmatic approach of giving it a try to live in India and especially to create the safety net for your kids right I think that's one of the reason I'm very curious about how did you come to the decision like evaluating

14:13 The different options and why you chose that would be very

14:18 Helpful okay so as I have mentioned to you we wanted to move to India but when we started putting things to paper everything all the timelines even the financials everything we realized one thing we are both now in a career position where you know it will be a career suicide if we just left everything and moved here yeah yes we will get high enough packages but my husband might have to compromise on some of the work that he's doing the type of work he's doing I might have to compromise on the work life balance so maybe the kids won't biggest fear that we had was maybe the kids won't adjust because my older one was 12 it's like what if she doesn't adjust and what if she we had also heard stories about kids going into depression once they are a bit older like how you know what what would we do then so yeah first thing we wanted to do was have a net where you know if it doesn't work out we can go back yeah because we

15:18 Might adjust my husband might also adjust but the kids so we had to get a citizenship so it would ensure the kids future in future if they want to do their col education or we want to move back so that was a first step then we were like okay should we probably do a experiment and then we were like we already bring kids for a few weeks every year here yeah is that not an experiment enough then we like no it's not enough because that's more like a holiday what we want to give them is more of a cultural experience you know cultural Exchange in schools we have these programs where kids go to probably Germany or Switzerland or turkey or different cult just to learn about the culture experiment with food experiment with language experiment with the social setup something like that and then let's see how it goes yeah I also wanted to work on a few things healthwise yeah because as I said I was in a different mental setup and physical setup so I wanted to experiment

16:19 On that so I talked at my work and they were quite happy to grant me a sabatical for one year they were initially they were like go for a few weeks it's like no it won't work out because the kids you know how many weeks two months three months yeah and then what do we do about kids education you know three months here and four months here it was just not aligning and then I like okay let's take one full year go over there let's see how it goes because see the thing is it's been so long the India that we left and the India that we return to we knew it would be different every year when we come to India we are at the same mental State at the same lifestyle at the same thought process and India has moved far away in just in that one year and it's been 13 years since I've lived here I have no idea how UPI works I have no idea how the schooling works all these things okay let's just take one year at a time yeah took a break for one year where my job is still secured over there and then my

17:20 Husband is still working in the UK he's not taken a break U because I took a complete Break so he's you know for his career he's much farther ahead than me so he continued his job in the UK he got some work from home from for here so that he could help us adjust here and then yeah here we are fantastic so sounds like a very pragmatic approach take one year at a time or one step at a time and see how things evolve and and and move forward to the next step so that's fantastic so let's talk about the kids right I think you mentioned especially the Elder one who is in the eighth grade and especially who has spent close to you know 13 years abroad with a different culture you know the languages how is it going for her I mean in terms of the transition in terms of the school education so anything that you can share I think that would be very helpful especially there are a lot of parents

18:21 Who are very anxious about moving kids who are in middle school right like you know who are like in grade seven and above so this would be very very helpful and anything that you can sh share that would be

18:34 Fantastic yeah that was our biggest worry as well so we spent a lot of time with the older one and deciding on the school for that was one major factor deciding on the board initially we didn't want to go for IB we were very sure on that our own reasons for that because IB is very similar to what they were studying in UK if we had to have it as a cultural exchange we had to have something apart from IB we looked at ICC and cbsc but the schools that we chose the school that we chose is got a very small class size so that was one major factor in making her comfortable because large class sizes where you know everyone H already have their groups and you know teacher won't even know your name in individually so small class size was very important for us staff how open they are how the head teacher

19:35 Responds to our requests of these things know our situation who understands our situation that was very important yeah of course but one thing that we did few of the things that we did was my husband is also from also very good Sportsman so it was his idea that first things first let's before she starts her school we have to have one sports activity for her okay which we didn't have in UK despite know despite such a environment over there so we asked her which sports she wants to join she said badminton and we started badminton for her over here which is daily yeah in UK all the classes are weekly here all the classes are daily so she joined that and one advantage for that was see when you play sport whatever is your life's frustration you just hit it and hit it and hit it so I think that help to you know bring in sort of a routine as well as bring in that sort of an you

20:35 Know Active Body mindset yeah which held in a way another was mentally we had to be with her yeah see I took a break for various reasons but also I did not join anything over here I did not start anything here only because I wanted to support her when she comes from school know how did her school go how how did everything go because there were a few challenges I won't say it was easy they did struggle both the kids struggled especially the older one she was like teachers over here they're not appreciative at all in UK you do a little bit good thing and they're like oh it's amazing great job here even if you do your best they'll be like yeah okay so they're not appreciative here the friends Mama they're all in coaching they all joined Alan how will I be able to cope with them I had to repeatedly tell them see you're not competing with them yeah they have a

21:37 Different path in life you have a different path in life you have to choose your own path it might not be same it will not be same as your friends I had to keep on telling her first tests happened and she she scored okay but she didn't score as well as she had hoped and there were a lot of tears and I was like see the thing is you do you're already doing so much you know you see you're already seven years behind them and still you're able to do this much that's great it's a very big responsibility on the parents grandparents whoever is close to them to tell them that it's okay you know we don't want you to be part of the Rat Race we really don't you know and we're there to support you whatever even if you don't want to you know choose the same path so we had to constantly tell her not once twice twice 10 times 100 times every day it was the same story every night we would talk and I would never never me and my husband we

22:37 Were very strict on that we would not start the topic of studies yes school yes friends yes teachers yes but studies oh what topic is happening whatp till she says so Mama I'm having difficulty in that I like yeah sure I'll help you I'll support you let's revise it tomorrow and then she was like Mama I'm really feeling behind I was like okay tell me which topic you don't understand I'll help you yeah we never brought this topic we never asked her how much marks she was like Mama today we got this merch and it's okay that's really good I was like okay how much are you expecting see in UK being Indian parents I was like see math you have to score 100% you know there's no compromise here she was like Mama how much do you expect I should get I was like I don't expect anything no but still how much no I don't expect no give me a number zero that's the number anything you score about that that's great for me so a lot of back and forth on that now she knows she herself gets this feeling that

23:38 No I have to have a routine discipline and I have to revise the topics in school but she's feeling slightly less pressured about her future yeah like see you have different paths and you can choose a different path and that's okay another thing was social setup that was another challenge there of course she had a lot of friends but here it's a different ball game when you have relatives you know every week there will be Gatherings meetings you know somebody is coming home we have to go visit some place and one of her comment was mama I'm tired of smiling because I have to smile and I have to go to some other people's place so then I was like okay you just know go in a different room or get a book read a book that's fine you know you bury yourself in a book nobody will question you yeah so navigating that my younger one she she's got no filters she's young also she's very

24:39 Small seven years old and you know she wouldn't know that there is a certain decorum here to maintain with grandparents you know you cannot just say anything that you want to them you have to respect them but she would just play with her Granddad her d as if he's her friend oh you didn't do that how can you do that and then you know we had to tell her no see he's your D you have to maintain this respect she still doesn't understand the younger one still doesn't understand but yeah slowly having that and getting some common activities to do with family my in-laws have been really supportive touchwood that's U you know that was one of the main reasons some people think that's a big challenge challenge because you'll be living with a different set of people but my in-laws have been very supportive I think mainly because they did not expect us to come back but we did so we had to move to a different house although we living in the same city where our in-laws lived

25:40 But that was more of a traditional house in a traditional Colony sort of you know everyone knows everyone everyone knows what you're doing what you're eating all that we knew that the kids would not feel comfortable there because privacy is a big enough thing for them especially at this age right they need their own space so we talked to them and we got we moved to the cleaner city of India indor we've got family connections as well over here it's still a very small City but we still chose a place where it's more flat structure you know up there are Apartments kids playground downstairs a bit more security safety so we moved there and so that the kids could make friend and they could also have the sort of privacy and we talked to our inlaw was beforehand that see this is what we're planning but we really want you to be with us they're like yeah whatever you say so that was ah I still thank my stars that you know they agreed for that so we moved here

26:42 And that again gave them a bit of a same sort of environment that they were having over there bit more priv and friends but still not know everyone knows everyone uncles aunts all those things relatives yes but still a bit far from the relatives where everyone is living close by so yeah these are some of the things that we thought a lot about but yeah finally the Stars aligned no thank you very much for such a detailed and being candid right I mean you know these are some of the challenges and like how you are handling those and giving some tips in terms of like how you are navigating these and having these conversations with your kids so thank you very much for sharing that so I think you kind of already indicated so you spe Bally chose indoor because of the family connections and that's where the in-laws and you know the parents you know the in-laws are from so how is the life been like I know you already mentioned you always spend like about three weeks every year more like on

27:43 Visiting but living here in India after 13 years abroad you know I think everybody changes as a personality right because you get used to like where you are living and how you think and everything changes so how has the life been living in India for the last few months is this what you expected or any surprises so yeah just give us a some insights on how how it's been going on so

28:09 Far well in one word if I have to sum it up it's sukun whatever reasons we moved here for they're all more or less happening so there is so much that I can fit in partly because I'm not working I've been working all my life and I'm not working here and partly because of of course it being India and it being a small city indor and it being with my in-laws support so a lot of things are aligning some things are still challenges things which are surprised is oh my God 10 minutes delivery I I don't think I can ever live without that now anything is over in the kitchen I just blink it and big basket and 10 minutes F here that's one of the best things I would say then the house helps there's someone who can clean everything someone who just arranges everything and cooks for you it's an amazing

29:10 Feeling I think I think I'm going to you know keep aside some budget even if I go back to UK or anywhere in the world just to have a personal cook who comes at least once a day so that's a that's a luxury I talk to my friends in uken that's a real luxury yeah challenges yes personal boundaries are a big problem over here but that's okay we knew that kids are struggling but that's okay another challenge is nobody respects time here time 11:00 means 11:40 12:15 12:30 anything and then you know people are very unplanned here I'm also I used to be a person who was very unplanned but if you're going to visit someone we are the type of we've become the type of people like you said right people change so we've become the type of people who would call First and say are you there then we'll go that's not the culture

30:11 Here so that's a bit of a shocker and then the expectations of everyone since you're here since you're not working yeah that's one thing I would like to mention is I'm a feminist woman and I've been working all my life yeah people have given me both sorts of their views and attitudes some people respect me for that some people are like okay you should have been with your kids and both both sides not going into that discussion but now that I'm not working and I'm in India there is this sort of expectation that you know for example if there is a function in my home I love to host big parties you know that's why I'm here for to meet the relatives so everyone is here I'm the one if there are some few guys also who are also on holiday but the thing is because I'm a woman there are certain

31:12 Expectations from me and there is a certain way in which My Views are views are respected by certain people I'm not saying everyone but by certain people that is a very big difference here this at this change in attitude when you know you're a woman versus you're a man and when you're working and when you're not working so that's something which I've not faced in UK even with very close people but I've faced very strongly here and the security and traffic that's a bit of a problem and I'm preparing my older daughter for certain things she's already faced this she's like Mama guys here they don't have any boundaries you just come and ask you for your number without even saying hello all those things so it's a bit of a you know challenging part for

32:14 Her so I'm helping her navigate from my experiences growing up but the positives of it is the attention that the kids are getting from their grandparents my older one she's sort of an introvert she would talk very less but you know her dad her Granddad would keep on asking her questions keep on asking her okay how did it go how did it not go sometimes she would get irritated frustrated but she has to answer right and then it just bringing her out from her shelf yeah my younger one she loves the fact that she can go down and play whenever it's weekend or whenever it's a holiday she would just call anadha this that and they would just come down and play so that's that's a great thing Hindi you asked me about kids challenges I have to talk about Hindi because I live in a Hindi belt not everyone might face this but a regional language in schooling is something of a given year in school schools

33:14 But so my kids they understand Hindi because me and my husband we talk in Hindi to the kids we talk in Hindi but kids they always reply in English yeah even among themselves they talk in English so speaking to writing and reading was going to be a big uphill task you also U started some tutions for them but the tutions over here are of a different way you know they would say okay kabut Mama what is say what is kabut they would not understand anything but we talk to the teachers the school teachers they said that we will we will definitely help you we will give extra time in school so that's why at school is very important we tried at home also now we're strictly talking to them in Hindi and once they started making friends right yes I would say it's the same thing whether you're in you're you're in a marati speaking region or whe whether you're Gujarati speaking place or even canar

34:15 Speaking Place once you make friends your friends will talk in that language and then you'll pick up the language just like that so that is that was a turning point when the kids started making friends friends you know they started going to birthday parties and you know playing downstairs and U in that Circle yes they speak in English sometimes but mostly a lot of times they speak in the regional language and they just pick it up at least speaking Yeah writing is still an issue they make some crazy hilarious mistakes but yeah they are at least just to manage by we don't want them to be pundits we don't want them to be great poets or writers in Hindi but you know just to manage by they doing okay yeah no thanks again for such a you know candid insights in terms of the life you know the challenges the positives and that you you and the kids and everybody faced you know in the last few months I think along that language thing I just want to

35:16 Confirm especially for the Elder kid right I mean again as you said I think she can converse I mean she understands the the language but she can't speak and write and all that stuff so how is she handling it in the school I mean do they have a special language or she has to do Hindi or is it graded just wondering on that particular aspect of the second language for cbsc in school how is that taken care there they do have Hindi it is graded

35:48 They have exams for that there are marks for that but her level was the level of Nursery because all she can do is she can just understand just basic Hindi so it as it it was a big challenge for us we talk to the teachers and head teachers when we joined as well all the schools we inquired a lot of schools over here and we talked to the Head teachers also and so a lot of people they gave us teachers they gave us different tips and tricks as you know at home you speak in Hindi you ask the grandmother to know ask them to help them in kitchen so that they would understand that language because the way we parents we speak we Millennials we speak Hindi is completely different it's mixed with English and you know it's not it's not even a Hindi which can help you score marks so you talk to grandparents they still speak that level of Hindi and then the teachers I talk to the teachers because the separate tution was not working out some of my

36:49 Friends who moved here they have as a school teachers and they are providing separate tutions but my kids school teachers they said that we will in the school itself we will give them a separate time whatever is their free period or whatever is their Hindi period they would give a separate worksheet and tasks for them even videos to watch so that they would slowly pick up Hindi because their level doesn't have to come from here to here it just has to come here so that next step becomes easy so it was a gradual approach still is a very gradual approach and we are not we not not losing us sleep over there at all because we know that even if they have to score on that even if it will bring down the marks all that still it's just still 10th standard it won't affect you know even the competitive exams if they have to give it so all they have to do is just pass yeah and some of the tips that I gave to my daughter thankfully they worked were for

37:51 Example just to give an example she had to write a formal letter in Hindi even the formal letter she didn't know what that mean meant so what I told her was this is the format you just learn the format and then copy the question in the description and you'll get at least 50% marks yes even if you don't understand a word of it just learn the format and copy the question in the description and you'll get some marks because teachers will there's marks for everything and that has worked yeah and that has helped us go about 60% and I'm very happy with that so these are some of the things which you know you know it works from your experience then your teach then the teachers they're there helping and yeah that's great again I don't know if you're open to that I know you mentioned about like you know you being Financial Savvy you kind of had like you know understanding of the Corpus if you're open especially for someone who is

38:52 Living in a like a indoor kind of a city right like in know t two city is there anything that you can guide or shed some insight in terms of the cost of living or what to expect you know because these is also some other common question that people has in terms of the what's a good amount of savings to be having a comfortable life you know in in general yeah if there's anything that you can share that would be fantastic okay so first thing is the

39:18 Cost of living because that's the first thing okay that can very for anyone for us I would say the household expenses which are sort of fixed the maids bills electricity bills goes up and down it's around 3,000 per month all other utilities made and all those milk milk is around 3,000 per month all that together comes to around and we live in a slightly expensive area of indor indor is actually not very expensive but as I told you we chose this area it comes to around 10 to 15,000 for fixed household expenses sure which you cannot do away for yeah then comes the groceries groceries kids love their avocado I love my avocado the kids love their you fruits which are not just apples and bananas so that takes our grocery bills to around 30,000 yeah

40:19 Then comes your school expenses school is expensive from IND standards but not that expensive it's close to around 1.2 lakh per person per year yeah plus uniform and all which is miscellanous we since we thought we'll we'll see for one year so we've only got like two sets of uniforms which we through so that's miscellaneous not that big stationaries all provided by school the same school in other cities it's almost double the cost if you look at pun and same same school fees is different and this comes into in in the category of High fees school if you look at inor yeah housewise we typically would not have had to spend anything because we had our ancestral home here but because we chose here we chose a fully furnished

41:19 House because we just for one year we didn't want to you know get a bed get an AC get this that so we just chose a fully furnished house came out of expensive everyone is different but yeah figures can vary a lot here so yeah that's been the expenses one expense that we did not count when we moved here which is still it's very high is travel because our relatives my parents are in different city my other relatives are in different places and I have to meet them all I have to attend all the important events I have to attend all the weddings everything how can I miss it right because I'm here for that this is something which I was missing so and I have to take kids also over there so even even at the cost of missing school teachers are not happy but it is what it is yeah so that travel expense and one thing is I also want the kids to explore India I'm from the travel industry and I don't want kids to

42:20 Be like oh what what is punchi and what is omkareshwar and what is jaur and how how far is it from IND oh my my God you can't do that okay you have to know about India at least your ancestral places so I I take them to all the places we go on a lot of trips to meet relatives but also to explore yeah earlier my U kids used to be like Mama why all the time temples and all these relatives like see the thing is in India if you have to go to a nice place all the gods they reside in all beautiful places so that's so that travel expense is a bit on the high side yeah but one thing that we did recently was instead of taking flights we took first AC in train which was an amazing experience great now thanks a lot for sharing such detailed information there really appreciate it so I'm just being mindful of the time so is there anything that we haven't covered I know this is a a test you know like it's been few months and you want to see how it unfolds but definitely want

43:22 To understand the thought process and you know what you have in mind in the future I mean again I think we can connect later but is there any topic that we haven't covered that you would like to bring up one topic that you did bring up but I did not I think I did not talk on that was the investing side of things I would say if you're planning to move to India be prepared for all event eventualities you don't know the future especially if you're a woman even if you're not a woman you have to be financially aware of how much savings you need whether or not investing is good for you retirement planning all those things your podcasts are a great very great resource but just be mind just start just start with whatever you want instead of just saving your money know have some Target and just put in some amount of that and then it'll give you some clarity compounding is a is the biggest magic of modern

44:24 Times you know you start investing and then it come pounds so yeah that is one thing which you're planning to move to India or even if you're just thinking about just just do that investing something which I would strongly strongly advise everyone to do it especially if they are planning to move anywhere yeah that's a big hit definitely I think compounding is the eighth magic or Eighth Wonder yeah I completely agree so I know this is I'm just curious I mean you being a social butterfly I mean you had a good social life life in UK and you know coming back to India after 13 years and you know indoor I I don't know like how activi is and so just curious how is that social life for you personally in terms of you know keeping yourself busy and so on after the

45:16 Move so it's more of a laidback City and people at this age it's very difficult to make friends but still indor is a very lively place and for me it's it's all about priorities my kids parents I would have made friends with them but the thing is with all the relatives and with all the you know that kind of setup of in-laws my parents both sides of families and I I told you I come from a large family so does my husband so it's keeping me busy busy busy enough entertained enough fulfilled enough for me to seek any other Avenues yeah but if you want there's lots to do there are so many for kids there are so many play areas play zones and you don't even have to think about oh there's a storm approaching it's too cold you know so all that is there so many activities for kids as well so many activities for

46:16 Me there's lots of kitty groups and Adventure trkking groups that's one thing which I didn't know which I didn't imagine would start here a lot of women only travel Adventure groups they go for trekking and stuff that I'm not able to find time especially when you have this thing in mind that okay after one year let's see how it happens how it goes so one year let's focus on family so just not leaving me with enough time that's great so any advice for the future aspirants from your

46:50 Perspective I would say don't fear for it but prepare everyone yes it's scary move if you're planning to move to India it's a very scary move especially all the stories that you hear in BBC and all the media so prepare your kids even if there is one person chance that you want to move back because struggle people feel is with kids and it becomes very easy when they know yes they know that their life is over there but still they they get this message from us that yes that we might move to back to India and this is the life which you might have to live if they know if you know an impending danger right even if you're bung jumping you know that okay this is where I would jump to it helps you just you know prepare mentally a bit better so especially for kids prepare them talk to them talk to them about your CH challenges how you grew up and what are the things to look forward to and send them this message even as

47:52 I said even if there is one person chance you might just spend your entire life in another country but even if there's 1% chance that you might move to India for any reason just prepare your kids now itself take them to India just keep them aware of the culture and the rituals and all those even even wherever you are no that's all that's a great advice so thank you very much really lot of valuable information lot of tips lot of insights and very candid conversation so really appreciate you taking the time and sharing your insights tips to us thank you very much Miss mon thank you so much aash my pleasure to be here yeah thanks a lot thanks